Cookies and Inferiority Complexes
by thelast.thingido
Summary: Snow is angry that Regina's kissing booth is more popular than her bake sale. Pure Fluff. One-shot. (Regina/Snow)
1. Cookies and Inferiority Complexes

AN: Tumblr prompt. I've been all about two head canons when it comes to snow queen lately. One is that Snow is a better kisser than Regina, and two is that Snow actually really sucks at cooking.

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I was angry. I knew I shouldn't be, but I was. The Storybrooke fair was in its first day, which was half way done, and I was sitting at my bake sale booth which had barely seen any customers. Save for Emma and Red, and a few others that were apparently the only ones loyal to me.

It didn't help that my booth was directly in front of the kissing booth. One that had a long line the entire day, because it was being led by none other than Regina Mills, former evil queen, elusive madam mayor. The whole thing was just so infuriating, as I glared at her giving small kiss after another, to men and women alike, and really—who does she think she is—

"Snow…?" David finally asked, seeing that my body language was tense. Of course he was sitting with me all day, lending support and mostly playing on his phone, because there was literally nothing else to do.

"What?" I snapped, looking over to him in time to see his cringe.

"Are you okay?"

"Thirteen dollars." He looked a bit confused at my answer, so I elaborated. "We've only made thirteen dollars, and we've been sitting out here for 4 hours."

"Well, I'm sure it's just a slow start." David optimistically suggested, but I wasn't buying it.

"Regina's booth line has been full the entire day."

"Well, she's not exactly selling baked goods." He chuckled, which made me glare at him.

"Are we mad at Regina now? Is that what's happening?" The question was asked, as David started to pick up one of my cookies and undo the plastic wrap. I smack his hand though before he could ruin it, making him sigh and put the previously untouched chocolate chip cookie back.

"I just think its tawdry, I mean there's children here." My argument is weak, and I know it.

"Why are you really mad?"

That made me huff a bit before I finally crossed my arms and pouted.

"I worked really hard on these cookies."

"I know, baby." His hand went around my shoulder, but I was shifting away from him just as quickly. Pointing an accusing finger at her booth.

"And she comes in here and overshadows everything…just like she always does."

I shouldn't be angry. I knew I shouldn't.

"It's all money for a good cause though, and they're just buying tickets because she used to be queen. It's a thrill for a lot of people…" My head slowly turned to look back at my husband, eyebrow raised. "I would imagine." David finished quickly.

A roll of my eyes, and I grabbed the cookie he was eyeing earlier, tossing it at him. He smiled big and proud, unwrapping his prize.

My sight went back over towards Regina's booth, seeing her lay a particularly long kiss on Robin, who was making his fourth round through. There was no real way to explain it. I knew I was being irrational, and it shouldn't make me angry. Especially the sight of her with Robin. It shouldn't make me absolutely furious. But it did. And even at the moment, I knew I'd have to start going back to seeing Archie. I could even hear him in my head, telling me that I repressing things and it was causing me to act out. That we needed to work on my inferiority complex that I had towards my step mother, and blah, blah, blah. I'd make an appointment in the morning, but as for now, I found myself storming over to Hook, where he was selling the tickets.

A few moments later I cut into the front of the line. To everyone's surprise, but none more so than Regina.

"What do you think you're doing?" I demanded, but the former queen recovered quickly.

"I'm donating my services for a good cause, dear." She said in a haughty tone, sitting back in her chair.

"Yeah, there's a name for that, Regina."

"What exactly is your problem?" The former queen chuckled, as if she knew exactly why I was angry, and that made me more upset, because I didn't even know why I was angry.

"My 'problem' is the fact that you're turning this fair into a sideshow."

Regina hummed a bit, as if she was considering me for something, just like she did when I was young. And it was infuriating then, just as it was now.

"I think your problem is that you're jealous." I noticeably scoffed at such a suggestion, making her simply shrug her shoulders a bit. "You could've done a kissing booth as well, but I'm sure it would be just as popular as your cookies."

Apparently her attention had been on my booth just as much as mine was on hers. That made me feel a little less crazy at least, but it didn't help my frustration.

"My cookies are amazing…" I began, first off, because they are. "And I have broken curses with my kiss, that's how good I am." I added lastly, proud of myself, even as Regina looked up at me from the chair as if she was looking down on me from a pedestal. Utterly bored and annoyed by my very existence, just as always.

"Even Pongo won't eat your cookies." Regina said with ice in her tone and a raised eyebrow, cool and collected. Oh, it just made me burn.

"At least my baked goods never put anybody in a magical coma!"

You could've heard a pin drop at that.

I was definitely going to see Archie in the morning.

Red swelled in her brown eyes as she shot up from her sitting position, level to me and angry. But I saw her glance around towards the crowd that was surely gathered, and it dampened her temper. Twisted her face into a condescending sneer. I preferred the anger, to be honest.

"I have more money to raise, and an endless amount of people who want to help me raise it," She paused to smile and wink at someone over my shoulder, causing me to roll my eyes. "So unless you have a ticket, dear—"

My hand reaches into my purse, pulling out a large roll of tickets, slamming them on the table of her booth.

"I bought them all." And that made her a bit speechless, her eyes wide and jaw slack, as she looked at the tickets, then back up at me.

I could see where her mind was going, and that wasn't my intention. I just wanted her to close her booth, with no more tickets to sell. Then the other people of the fair could give patron to other booths. I just wanted her to stop kissing people. That was all.

"I'm not going to kiss you." She whispered, almost too quietly, her voice actually shaking at the idea.

And wasn't that interesting?

I actually had shaken the big bad evil queen and ice cold mayor? Huh. Finally she was a bit speechless, and I had the control. That was an appealing idea.

"Oh." My voice had a faux innocence to it. "Okay, well then you can go over to the petting zoo with the rest of the chickens." I smirked and Regina acted like I just slapped her in the face.

"Excuse me?" A few people chuckled behind me, which stopped abruptly from the sharp glare given by the former queen.

"It's fine, Regina. Really." I flashed teeth in the fakest smile I could manage. "I just wasn't aware that you were a big ol' scardy cat."

I could actually hear her teeth grinding.

"You are a literal child."

And yes, that was probably true. My level of maturity seemed to depend a lot on who I was around, and when I was around her, it always made me feel my youth. It made me young and sort of helpless to her whim, but this was one of the only times that it was actually working in my favor.

My hands went on the table, making me lean in closer to her.

"What are you afraid of?" The levity started to melt away from my tone, and her eyes narrowed. "Are you scared I'm going to break the curse of your smart mouth?"

A cocky grin graced my lips, and there'll be hell to pay for this later, I'm sure—what with the way she was practically growling at me.

But then she kissed me. Quite suddenly.

Which was fine.

That was what I expected.

I was totally fine.

My head tilted, running on instincts and fitting our lips together better. There was an urge to reach up and cup her cheek, but I decided against it, because this wasn't affecting me. Not at all.

Well, maybe a little.

Just in the sense that I had no concept of time, and my head was swimming. Her lips were insanely soft, which was new for me. My tongue traced her bottom lip, even though it shouldn't have. It was just supposed to be a quick peck to shut her up.

She wasn't letting go though, and I'll be damned if I'm the first one to pull away.

Though pride only took me too far, because when she felt my tongue, her mouth started to open. I broke the kiss, not at all wanting to make out with my step mother in front of the entire town.

Or at all.

Not even a little.

I pulled away, sort of jerked away, tense and awkward. When I opened my eyes to look back at her, I was afraid of what I would see. What I didn't expect to see is her completely dumbstruck. The slow blinks of her eyes and mouth still parted, it made me start to smile. Then she licked her lips quickly, before clearing her throat and avoiding eye contact.

My smile grew as she sat back down, completely speechless and still not looking at me. I actually saw a blush creeping up her neck.

Maybe my cookies did suck, but I was an amazing kisser.

There was no need to gloat though, my anger and inferiority suddenly a distant memory, and nothing could wipe the smile off of my face. I turned back towards the line behind me.

"Those tickets are on me. Enjoy the fair."

As I made my way back towards my booth, David was waiting for me with a shocked look on his face.

"So…are we not mad at Regina anymore?" He asked and I grabbed another one of my cookies, tossing it at him.

"It's all for a good cause." Is all I said in response, making him side eye me a bit, but he dug into the plastic wrap regardless.

At least David liked my baking.


	2. What's the Opposite of Damage Control?

AN: I have no excuse for this continued fluff. I just really wanted to make some fun light hearted snow queen that wasn't strickly brotp. I've been writing too much pain lately lol

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I was content. Content and minding my own business at the Diner a few days after the fair. David was over at the counter talking with Leroy and I was fussing over Neal in one of the booths. He just finished his bottle, so I'm whispering sweetly while trying to burp him. Then quite abruptly, Regina sits herself across from me, sliding into the seat flawlessly, and a feeling of regal superiority always following her whether she meant it or not. Or whether it was just in my mind or not. She didn't look like there was anything urgent she needed to talk about, but it was still odd for her to just invite herself into my space unless she needed something. So I didn't really greet her, and she didn't really seem to mind, just sort of looking over me curiously. Mostly trying for disinterested in her stare, and it mostly made me roll my eyes.

"Have you thought at all about the other day?" She asked suddenly, and I would've responded more clearly, but Neal started to fuss for a moment, making little noises that pulled at my attention.

"What? What other day?"

"When we _kissed_." The last word was whispered, so I wasn't sure if I heard her right. That and I wasn't going to have her whispering this entire conversation to me across a table while I have a loud baby with me. There was no patience in me today for that.

"When we what?" My face scrunched in annoyance, and I swear I saw her blush a bit.

"At the fair." Regina finally snapped, so my face cleared. Why was she brining this up? Was she mad? Two days later, and honestly why does she pretend like she doesn't have my phone number? She has far too much attachment to dramatic entrances.

"Oh…" I started, and then Neal finally burped, so it pulled my attention once more. "No." Was my absent minded finish towards my step-mother.

"What do you mean, no?" There was a haughty snark in her tone that I didn't appreciate while I put my son back into the car seat that was sitting on the seat next to me.

"I mean, no. Can you hand me that rag?" I waved my hand at the cloth that was just out of my reach on the table. Regina handed it to me without hesitation, knowing the power of my son's scream when left unhappy for any amount of time. She made a comment once that she knew where he got that from. I tried to feel offended, but it was hard when she said it in a soft baby voice while tickling Neal's feet.

"I'm not here in any aggressive sense. We ended up raising more than enough for the repairs at the school." I wasn't looking at her, but my eyes narrowed because she was starting to talk a little too proper, a little too much of her old accent coming out. That always meant something was upsetting her. At the least. "It all ended up for the best, but your behavior could have been better, to say the least."

My head raised, once Neal was content, confusion in my voice.

"What? Are you mad?"

"I said I wasn't." She said with a tight jaw and anger in her eyes. It was very convincing. "I simply thought you might be…repressing some feelings."

There was a sudden realization that I didn't have the slightest clue what she was talking about, because she's being so roundabout with it, even though she's the one who approached me.

"If you're not mad, than why are we talking about this?" With my son drifting off into a nap, my full attention was now on Regina, curious to figure out what exactly she was doing here.

"I figured it was eating away at you, and of course, I wouldn't blame you. But if my kiss gave you doubts—or…feelings you shouldn't have. We should talk about that." She didn't even grant me eye contact when she started rambling so ridiculously. Though, I suppose the only thing more ridiculous was me daring her to kiss me in front of half the town. So I laughed. I laughed lightly, a bit a chuckle, and a smile tugging at my lips.

Regina looked at me then.

"It wasn't that amazing."

"Excuse me?"

Okay, now she was mad, because my tone was a bit too rude. But this was ridiculous. I wanted it known that her accusing me of my world stopping because of a peck on the lips was _ridiculous._

"I'm just saying, I mean…" I sighed, trying to do a little damage control. "The kiss wasn't 'bad'…in a sense." Her eyebrow arched at my struggles, and this was all my fault. This is the consequence I have to deal with for ever thinking I could one up Regina Mills. Story of my life. "But it happened so fast, and it's not your fault. I guess you get spoiled when you can break curses with your kiss." I shrugged, and she stabbed her finger against the table top a few times her eyes bright with insult.

"I've broken curses with my kiss too, you know. That doesn't make you special."

This was getting childish, and I was starting to think that I didn't have as tight of grasp on this situation as I thought.

"Does that really count? I mean, in this context…?" I asked, and she scoffed.

"I have had plenty of men loyal to me, for less than a kiss."

If I didn't know any better, I'd say she was jealous.

But I did know better, of course I did. She wasn't jealous, because she had true love—or a soulmate—or whatever equivalent to that was. She wasn't jealous of me. Bitter and hateful, sure, but this was about something else. I could tell.

Still it didn't stop me from poking fun at her a bit more, with a confused innocence that was as fake as press on nails.

"Didn't you just take their hearts, or something?" I may have pushed too far with that one, because there was a familiar look of murder and rage that flittered on her face. It was a diluted version, but a strike of fear hit me like instincts.

"David!" She called out, gaining his attention from across the Diner—his and everyone else's. My eyes widened at Regina, glancing at my husband as he walked over with a nervous smile on his face.

"Is everything okay?"

"Of course." Her voice was deceptively pleasant all of a sudden, as she stood up to face him while gesturing towards me. "I have something I need Snow's help with, can you watch Neal for a moment?"

"Regina…" I started, confused and warning all at the same time.

"Why do you need Snow's help?" David was suspicious, rightfully so, because I was suspicious too.

"It's private." With a frustrated wave of her hand. "A private _girl_ thing."

And that was apparently all that needed to be said for Regina to abduct me from my table. If only she had known it would've been that easy when we were in the enchanted forest.

'Put your sword down, David and let me execute your wife. Don't worry, it's a _girl thing._ '

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I had no idea what she was doing when she dragged me into the woman's bathroom and locked the door behind her. I was scared, but the location was really just making me wonder if she did need help with a 'girl thing'. I tried to remember if I had any tampons in my purse that I left at the table, until she spoke over my thoughts.

"Let's have a do over." Regina ordered very matter-of-factly, placing herself in front of me.

"What?"

"Kiss me." My eyes went wide, so she rolled hers.

"No."

"I will prove that I can make you weak in the knees," She spoke with a smug smirk, and I took a step back from her. "That you would give everything up for only the chance to be in my presence."

This wasn't funny anymore. This was weird and a bit upsetting, because honestly;

"Why would you want that from me?" I demanded quietly. "What would that accomplish, Regina?" She looked at me as if she hadn't really thought that far ahead.

The serious tone that started to settle so quickly was turning my stomach into knots. Moments that felt like hours passed in the space between us.

"You really felt nothing when we kissed?" Regina asked quietly, and I could tell she wanted to break the eye contact, but she was too stubborn.

"Why—What did…" Oh. Oh I got it. It was bright red flashing lights, and really why did it take me so long to see? She was practically spelling it out for me since she came to sit down at my table. "You felt something."

"Don't be ridiculous." With a scoff and a wave of her hand that was a little too easy to see through. This wasn't good. I shouldn't indulge, but then again; suddenly I had a little control back. Something so rare with Regina, and I was starting to realize that it went to my head a little too much.

"…Then I'll leave." I shrugged, seemingly unaffected and challenging at the same time. "Go break more curses with your platonic mom kisses, or whatever boring people are doing now a days."

And just the _insinuation_ that I was cooler than Regina was enough to set her off.

"You insolent little—" She began with venom, but I cut her off.

"Just admit that I swept you off your feet." My voice started to turn to a mocking tone. "That you would give everything up for only the chance to be in my presence—"

Regina reached up to grip the back of my neck, leaning in and kissing me firmly on the lips. A squeak of shock came out of my throat, not expecting this at all. Quickly though, her firm kiss turned softer, and my tensed body relaxed on instinct.

Because I apparently had terrible instincts.

Our kiss was soft, her hand on my neck moved to cup my cheek, but I was having a panic attack in my head. A loud screaming voice of authority telling me that I had to _stop_ , that this was _dangerous,_ that I was getting trapped, and the first rule of a bandit was _don't get trapped._

My rationalizations were melting away when I felt Regina's tongue trace my bottom lip, and my mouth opened to her almost instantly. My hands gripped at her arms, keeping myself steady because her body was closing the space between us.

I was trapped.

She was doing this thing, this thing with her teeth nipping at my bottom lip that made me melt, so I pulled away from her. I broke the kiss, sort of, even though our faces were still practically touching, sharing each other's shaky breath.

"See? I'm an amazing kisser." She whispered, and it almost made want to cry. This wasn't funny anymore.

"Regina…"

She kissed me once more, light and playful.

"Just admit that I sweep you off your feet." Regina had a smile in her voice, and it made me pull back from her abruptly, me being the one that was obviously shaken this time.

"I have to get back to my family." I said seriously, making her face fall, maybe realizing the reality of this along with me. "Let's never do this again."

Then I leave, shaken and mouth swollen, but I couldn't stay in that bathroom with her another moment. There was no telling—…

As soon as I got back to my booth where David was, I got my cell phone out and dialed Archie's number. I really needed to make a long overdue appointment.


End file.
